Look for the Helpers
You are on family vacation, driving down the highway and you suddenly see ambulances, police cars and lights flashing...Your child walks through the room just as a graphic war scene is flashed on the TV screen...Your inclination is to shield your child from anything scary or disturbing, but sometimes you are not able. How do you handle these situations? I turned to Mr. Rogers for his timeless advice. 2008 marks the 40th anniversary of the first Mister Rogers' Neighborhood show that aired on PBS. Sadly, Mr. Rogers died in 2003. CNN described him as a "cultural icon and kindly neighbor to generations of American children".
Mister Rogers' mother used to tell him to "look for the helpers" in any kind of a crisis situation. What great advice! There are always caring, helpful people when I find myself in a crisis as an adult. This thought also helps me stay calm in a crisis, which is important because my grandchild very quickly picks up on my emotions. A worried adult can worry a child.
When a crisis occurs how do you handle the "why did this happen" question? Since many times we don't know the answer, a better response might be to turn the question around and ask the child what they think happened. This will give you an opportunity to find out if your child has misconceptions that you can clear up. It's okay to tell your child that you don't know why something bad happened either and that it is okay to feel sad and scared. Let your child know that you love them and that you are there to help them.
The nurses on 454-KIDS get calls about children who are sick, but they also get calls that deal with these kinds of concerns, too. Please call us. We'd be happy to help you.
March 20th marks what would have been Mister Rogers 80th birthday. On his program Mister Roger always wore sweaters his mother made for him. March 20th has been declared "Sweater Day" in honor of Mister Rogers and all are encouraged to wear a sweater that day. The nurses at 454-KIDS will have their sweaters on!
